Dear Babby: An advice column for the lovelorn

Transcribed by Larry Fyffe (not to be confused with ‘Dear Abby’, an advice column in American newspapers)

 

Dear Babby:

I have a girlfriend who likes to dance which is fine, but I need advice on how to saddle her:

Well, I got a new pony, she knows how to fox-trot, lope and pace
She got great big hind legs
And long black shaggy hair above her face
(Signed: New Pony)

 

Dear New Pony:

When you’re get back from dancing, use some reverse psychology on her:
All the tired horses in the sun
How am I supposed to get any ridin’ done
All the tired horses in the sun
How am I supposed to get any ridin’ done

 

Dear Babby:
I do my best to flatter sweet Marie; she keeps promising but always ends up saying, ‘not yet’:

 

Honey, just allow me one more chance
To ride your passenger train
Well, I’ve been lookin’ all over
For a gal like you
(Signed: Honey Just Allow Me One More Chance)

 

Dear One More Chance:
Tell her how it feels to be on your own like a complete unknown:
Well your railway gate, you know I just can’t jump it
Sometimes it gets so hard you see
I’m just sitting here beating on my trumpet
With all these promises you left for me

 

Dear Babby:
Where can I find my ideal of a perfect woman:

 

I need a dump truck baby to unload my head
She brings me everything and more and just like I said
Well, if I go down dyin’ you know she bound to put a
blanket on my bed
(Signed: From A Buick Six)

 

Dear Buick Six:
Don’t be picky, if you get any chance at all, grab on to her:

 

Listen to the engine, listen to the bell
As the last fire truck from hell
Goes rolling by
All good people are praying

 

Dear Babby:
How can I convince Jan, my litte red-headed darling, to run away with me:

 

Little red wagon, little red bike
I ain’t no monkey but I know what I like
I like the way you move me strong and slow
I’m takin’ you with me, honey baby, when I go
(Signed: Buckets Of Rain)
Dear Buckets Of Rain:
I happen to know Jan. She’s run off with a man who looks like a monkey:

 

Tweeter and the Monkeyman were hard up for cash*
They stayed up all night selling cocaine and hash
To an undercover cop who had a sister named Jan
For some reason unexplained she loved the Monkeyman

 

Note:  Readers who which to seek Dear Babby’s advice, can reach him in care of the ‘Untold Dylan’ email address.
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What else is on the site

1: Over 400 reviews of Dylan songs.  There is an index to these in alphabetical order on the home page, and an index to the songs in the order they were written in the Chronology Pages.

2: The Chronology.  We’ve taken all the songs we can find recordings of and put them in the order they were written (as far as possible) not in the order they appeared on albums.  The chronology is more or less complete and is now linked to all the reviews on the site.  We have also recently started to produce overviews of Dylan’s work year by year.     The index to the chronologies is here.

3: Bob Dylan’s themes.  We publish a wide range of articles about Bob Dylan and his compositions.  There is an index here.  A second index lists the articles under the poets and poetic themes cited – you can find that here.

4:   The Discussion Group    We now have a discussion group “Untold Dylan” on Facebook.  Just type the phrase “Untold Dylan” in, on your Facebook page or follow this link 

5:  Bob Dylan’s creativity.   We’re fascinated in taking the study of Dylan’s creative approach further.  The index is in Dylan’s Creativity.

6: You might also like: A classification of Bob Dylan’s songs and partial Index to Dylan’s Best Opening Lines

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1 Response to Dear Babby: An advice column for the lovelorn

  1. Larry Fyffe says:

    Honey, Just Allow Me One More Chance: ‘Your railroad gate, you know I just can’t jump it’

    “…,we’ll jump this top fence rail”
    (Woody Guthrie: Fastest Of Ponies)

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